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*presses his back against the wall and looks down the hall* |
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How’s it look? |
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*on the other side, with a duster-coat and two huge laser guns in each hand* AHAHAHHAHA!! |
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Yeah, Uhm, Not too good.
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What are you talking about? |
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*a blast comes down the hall and nails the wall* |
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Ah. I see. |
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*cocks his glock* We’ve got no choice! Let’s make a break for it! *busts out from the wall and runs down, his gun blazing* |
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NO!! |
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*looks over* *smirk* |
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*the motion freezes, a loud guitar is heard and an after image splits off the left. Then an to the right, blurring the screen incredibly as it does this after image thing 4 more times*
*Nack stands on one side of the room as Wario and Bass stand on the other*
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*spins up his guns and leans forward* You’re all are DEAD! |
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Attack -> Subject -> game: Megaman X: Command Mission!
*a single blast comes from Wario’s hands and nails Nack in the face*
6572!
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Nack: *spins around and shoots at Wario*
MISS! |
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Bass: Idea -> End -> Stupid Battle system
*holds his arm cannon and ducks down, a bar with the button “a” next to it loads up.
*presses a like a bitch and bar fills up to 50%*
*energy flies off Bass’ gun and smashes Nack*
9999!
*throws up his gun in the air like Saturday Night Fever* WHEW! I DID IT!!!!
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Nack: What the hell was all that about? |
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We’re talking about Megaman X: Communist Mission. |
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Hey hey! It’s “Command Mission”, tubbo.
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Oh? Really? Suck my ass you walking tin can. No one-a cares about your anal ness. |
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You said anal. |
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Shut the hell up.
Okay, this is a Megaman game, so I know a little more than you brats this time.
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Well, then you must of known it really sucked. |
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Not really something I would want to be proud about. |
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Yes. This was Capcom’s failed attempt at an RPG. Let’s start with one of the most important elements in an RPG: Story. |
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Wow. Go around and fight 8 bosses. Hm. That’s never been done before.
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Well, besides that. You were fighting on a resistance trying to fight the mavericks…or something like that. Either way, Megaman is now decked out in this really crappy outfit and has bright red energy fly out of his shoulder blades each time he dashes. I didn’t think he could look any stupider. Boy was I wrong. |
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 |
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Okay, I kind of liked his design. But, it was out of nowhere. And, he drops it in the next X game. So, what the hell? Blue blue blue, and all of a sudden you got a new wardrobe but drop it?! |
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This is almost as bad as Bass in Megaman Exe. Why the hell is he wearing a Spanish tarp? He’s a robot! What the hell?! |
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Hey hey! The tarp is freaking awesome! |
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You look like a HOBO! |
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You look like a lard ball made out of 100 percent fat. Oh wait. You are.
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At least I don’t have fins on my head. |
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UH. There was some pretty interesting, cool characters that got introduced. You’ll probably never be able to play as any of these guys again, and they were specially made for this RPG. As well as that, you also had classic characters you could play as.
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Yeah, but that was about the only good thing about it. The story was terrible. You’re fighting against the Mavricks because…they’re bad. It never deviates from that or focuses on any one character. You never learn anything intimate about anybo- |
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*GUITAR* |
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What the hell? We’re in a battle?! |
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That was random |
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*tiny little robot*
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Oh well, I guess this is a good time to talk about the battle system. Even though I really wanted to finish talking about the crappy-ass story. |
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:P
You have a bar of “energy” (not your health) that you can use to perform secondary attacks (with the x and y buttons). Which I guess is their answer for not learning any magic. Then you have your main attack, which is…your main attack that doesn’t really change.
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And, for gamecube, if you press R you get a special. And depending on how high this “energy” bar is filled, is how powerful the attack is, or more time to do the attack. Zero, for example, had 3 moves to do in street fighter 2 style thing. And you have 10 seconds to pull off as many as possible (but you only have 3 to choose from) and when time’s up, he….beats the living crap out of the other guy. |
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HEH! Zero! He’s the loser with the boob-lights, right? |
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*signals left with his boob-lights* |
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MINE-EYES!!! |
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Hot stuff, coming through *fixes perfect hair* |
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*SMASH!* |
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This part is actually kind of fun. At the bottom you can also see the turn base, who’s going to come up next. And, the more “speed” you equip, the greater chances are for your turn. You also get new weapons that actually change during battle. You don’t get any armor. But… |
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Oh fuck. There’s these stupid things you can equip to give them higher stats or what not. It’s KINDA like armor but not really. It’s like +1 power or +2 Speed. You have a grand total of 4 slots, and that’s it. WOW. Freaking AMAZING. *shoots bad guy*
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That was kind of annoying. Good thing it didn’t take that lo- |
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*GUITAR*
*bad guy appears*
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WTF! We took one step and we’re in another battle!! *SMASH BAD GUY* |
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Jesus. I hope that doesn’t happen too often- |
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*GUITAR* |
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SKJLHDKBKSKJDSKJDBKNJS!!!!!!!!! *KILLS EVERYTHING*
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What the hell! When do we get to move on to the next subj- |
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*GUITAR!!11!shift* |
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MOTHER-FUCKER! WHAT’S WITH ALL THESE RANDOM BATTLES?! This is HORRIBLY annoying! I don’t care how fucking awesome the battle system is, this is just ridiculous. What kind of half ass programming has RANDOM-BATTLES anyway?! Is it SO fucking hard to code BAD GUYS that you can see, so if you don’t feel like fighting you don’t have to mess with it?! Jesus Christ!!
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Wario, what are you doing? |
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NOT PUTTING IN CHEAT CODES FROM CODEJUNKIES.COM. THAT’S FOR SURE. NOPE. NOT ME.
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Why do we have all the bad ass weapons and our speed is +200? |
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….LUCKY. *looks at bad guy* RAWR!!! |
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9999!
9999!
9999!
*bad guys energy goes down to 1*
FINAL STRIKE
*everybody does super bad ass moves*
1,234,534,543,451
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WOO! THAT WAS AWESOME!
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You know... we could of use that Final Strike at the BEGINNING! Or sometime in the middle, not at the end! |
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Yeah that might have been nice. But! Final Strike! C’mon! Now he’s not only kinda dead, he’s REALLY DEAD! |
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Not when you’re facing some hard ass boss, you spend an hour trying to beat him, and THEN get final strike when he has 4 HP left. |
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Ohhh shit! We forgot Hyper Mode? |
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What? |
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Hyper Mode! You can go Hyper whenever you want, and become this different, stronger version of yourself for like…4 turns anytime you want.
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So it’s like FF’s limit-break. |
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Not really. You can do it whenever you want, and you can only do it once unless you have an item that gives that back. |
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…That sucks ass. |
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It’s kind of neat, because the character’s outfit completely changes. But only for 4 turns or so. |
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Shit! The health! |
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AAUGH!! Okay okay! I’ll knock this out quick! The health is replenished in play, on your turn by a reserve tank. And you find reserve tank energy on the field. THERE |
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*GUITAR*!! |
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AAAUUGH! *ATOM-BOMB* |
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Voice acting! |
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God I don’t think I heard something this bad since Sonic Adventure 1 and 2. |
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Yes. It’s terrible. The only half decent one if the girl, Marino. |
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MARIO!? |
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No. Marino. The hot bitch. |
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Oh yeah :D |
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Yeah. Everyone else sounds like a high surfer dude that has a hot poker up his ass. Absolutely terrible. |
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Giggity-gitty-graphics! |
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These we’re okay. There was nothing special though. All the attacks looked the same, and there wasn’t anything that was like: OH. PRETTY. O.O!! |
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The music! I actually liked the music. There were some pretty bad ass techno tunes. |
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Yes, but it was ALL techno! No matter what you’re doing, it’s all techno! And most of it didn’t even fit the game. |
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*dancing like crazy* |
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This is just the way to the item shop |
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*pulls out glow sticks* The RAVER SHOP! |
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I see what you mean, Nack. |
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*GI-TAR!!!* |
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SKJHDKHJLSHJKLDSKJHNKSJNKS |
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*signals right with his boob-lights* |
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AAAAAAAHUUUHHH!!!! *throws game against wall* |
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Okay!
- Story: 5
Pro: There’s some new characters, and it sticks to the X story. No real major plot holes.
Con: It’s the same stupid thing. Go fight super robots. Not only that, there’s no insight to characters. You just find news guys to fight with.
- Playability: 1
Pro: The battle system (the MAJOR part of playing) is kind of cool. There’s some neat concepts.
Con: There’s too many GOD. DAMN. BATTLES! Every fucking half a step I’m in another battle! I just want to get to the damn boss already! It’s not good when the major play part of the game is ANNOYING!
- Voice-Acting: 2
Pro: The hot bitch was good
Con: GOD. CAPCOM! HIRE SOME FUCKING DECENT PEOPLE!! FOR THE LOVE OF GOD!!! I can’t feel anything they say and they all sound the same _ALL_ the time!
- Graphics: 6
Pro: Looked very good.
Con: Nothing too new. Bleh.
- Music: 5
Pro: Sounded awesome!
Con: It was all the same, fast stuff. There were no real slow songs. 5 is a low score, but it’s an RPG based on emotion. There was no emotional music.
- Overall score: 4
Final Thoughts: Don’t buy this game unless you are a HUGE Megaman fan. Even then, you will be disappointed.
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Hey look! Fan-mail! Let’s read some! |
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Sure. Why not. |
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I love it more then any of your comics. Its some of the funniest stuff I've ever read! I really like how you review video games too, that’s awesome. If you ever get bored with it...I'll take over XD
I love writing Video Game revies, but anyways I love it and its really awesome. Keep them coming. FAST! I NEED MY FIX MAN! COME ON! Oh yeah, whos Nack? Was he on a Knuckles exclusive? Like Chaotix or sumthin?
Anyways I'm gonna go.
Cheers,
Este
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WHO’S NACK!!! WHO’S NACK!!!!! AAAUUUUGGGGHHHH!!!! |
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HA HA! You freaking loser! |
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*Grabs camera* I was in Sonic Triple Trouble and Sonic Fighters!! THE….WITH THE…AND THE….;.; |
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About taking over. Yeah, that won’t be happening. I like being the leader. |
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Hey who said you was the leader! |
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God. |
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Oh. Okay. |
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*GUITAR* |
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GOD. FUCKING. DAMMIT!! |
